pu$$y pu$$y pu$$y marijuana

16 Apr

from “i could pee on this”

Dear Freddy,

We met just over a year ago. I might have been a bit tipsy that night. and yes, who could forget how i chased you around your room, trying to make you love me (luckily I played a bit more coy with your human). Some might characterize your reaction to my advances as “utter disinterest.” But upon further reflection, you did throw some “OMFG she’s needy/pathetic/weird/creepy” shade my way. which, of course, i took as “i might have a shot with you.”

Thankfully the “playing hard to get” worked for your equally-handsome human.

And thankfully my “I can’t hug every cat” neurosis didn’t lead you to scratch my eyes out.

You’ve been sick since the time we met. But I could see past the failing body. I could see the strong, virile man-cat/warrior prince you once were. I could see that you held secrets of the universe in your eyes…and that they were yours and yours alone. And that nose. Oh how I loved that nose!

And in time, you began to love me back. You knew I was on your side. That I wanted to figure out how to make you better. You (and your human) humored me when I bought you all sorts of thingamabobs and whatchamacallits to help your joints and your thyroid and your weak bladder. I even thought about getting you a medical marijuana card after listening to my favorite brazilian girls” song “pu$$Y pu$$y pu$$y marijuana (“i swear it’s for my BF’s cat!”). You suffered me when I put you in cat diapers. You even laid down in the bed I got you…once. And you knew in your sweet kitty heart that I cared for you like my own.

freddy’s one time chillin in his bed

I would’ve held in my pee forever if it meant more time with you. But it was time. It was your time to cross over the rainbow bridge. You fought it tooth-and-nail because that’s what a warrior prince does. And while I cry for the 2,457 time as I type this, my heart is at peace. Cuz I know at this very moment you’re in kitty heaven eating your weight in delicious noms while the angels rub your silly belly.

It goes without being said that your human dad and your kitty sister are going to miss you like crazy…but don’t you worry a second about them. I’m gonna give them lots of head bonks (sorry human) and belly rubs and love in your honor. It’s gonna be awesome.

And until we meet again in the big petco in the sky, know that I cherished every moment with you, sweet prince.



3 Responses to “pu$$y pu$$y pu$$y marijuana”

  1. Yonni April 16, 2013 at 7:38 pm #

    😦 So sorry for your loss – it has been 11 months since I had to say goodbye to my princess and a year and three months since my special big guy left the planet – they were with me 18 and 17 years. I still can not bring myself to allow another into my life. My heart goes out to you – big hugs!

  2. tilda2 April 16, 2013 at 8:49 pm #

    So very sorry. That poem is one of our favorites. {{hugs}}

  3. mbavaresco April 18, 2013 at 11:48 am #

    Oh my… I´m so very sorry!

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